You wouldn’t wear the same outfit to the Oscars, a Little League game, and your cousin’s beach wedding. Most of us feel that different situations typically require different types of attire.   Similarly, it’s helpful to be able to vary the elements of your communication style, to choose a different verbal outfit, when you’re talking … Read more

My family collects coffee mugs. We have mugs from different theaters where we’ve worked and various places we’ve visited, mugs with inspirational quotes and handmade mugs from local potters. In fact, we have so many mugs that they vie for space on one crowded shelf in a kitchen cabinet. Despite our many mugs, we tend … Read more

Most of us have heard this well-worn advice about structuring a talk:   Tell ‘em what you’re gonna tell ‘em Tell ‘em Then tell ‘em what you told ‘em.     I have to admit, this rankles me a little. If this was all there was to being an effective speaker, everyone would be one. Clearly, this formula doesn’t always … Read more

When things go wrong, they go wrong in a series of steps.   First my alarm didn’t go off, then I spilled coffee all down my front, then I was running late, then I got a speeding ticket, then I missed twenty minutes of the important client meeting…you see what I mean.   But if … Read more

Stop practicing.   That’s right. There comes a point in every preparation process when you need to take a break and stop practicing. More rehearsal won’t help until you’ve given yourself some time away from the material and from your own self, working on it.   Usually that day or so away helps you synthesize; … Read more

Listening is a truly difficult task, and we do it, or attempt to, every day.   Even when we’re interested, even when we care about the person who is talking, listening truly and deeply is just…hard. Our minds are racing, thinking about what we need to get done, what we need to say, what the … Read more

Each of us has rules that govern our behavior.   I’m not talking about laws, or policies, or even societal mores. I’m talking about our individual, internal rules that we’ve adopted over time, gathered from many sources. These rules tell us they will help us feel secure, they will keep us safe. An analogy my … Read more

I’m directing a play right now, Jeeves Saves the Day by Margaret Raether, which is an adaptation of P.G. Wodehouse’s famous Bertie and Jeeves stories from the 20s and 30s. In the play, a very thickheaded character named Egbert (Eggie) Bakewell is constantly getting himself and his cousin Bertie Wooster into trouble. No matter what … Read more

In August of 2017, my family took an overnight backpacking trip to be in the right place to see the total eclipse. My husband had done a ton of research to find a high clearing, Tusquittee Bald, with perfect visibility of the eclipse, only an hour or so from us. We hiked in with friends the night … Read more

My friend Liz was buying new glasses. She knew from experience that looking at yourself in the mirror in the glasses store doesn’t replicate the experience of having the glasses be an integrated part of your life, and she wanted her glasses to be awesome, so she made a plan.   First, she took a … Read more