The other day, as I was scrolling through an online forum dedicated to my favorite college basketball team (go Heels!), a comment jumped out at me. In response to the question: “Do you think Coach prepares his speeches to the team?” one person responded, “No way. It’s off the cuff. He speaks from the heart.”
The implication here is, of course, that both things can’t be true. That he cannot both prepare his speeches and speak from the heart. And this assumption makes me a little sad.
It’s sad because it bolsters the false notion that people are either good speakers or they aren’t. That either you prepare, sweating bullets all the way, or you simply open your mouth, speak, and the people are moved to tears. This misunderstanding of how good speakers practice leads many people to simply give up before they even start. “I’ll never be able to do that, so why try?”
There is another idea here that anything prepared will be in some way less genuine. That when it’s off the cuff, you know you’re getting the “real person.” Well, maybe. Frequently, though, you’re getting a version of the person that isn’t exactly what they want to share, or the best that that person has to offer.
Preparation and authenticity aren’t mutually exclusive.
When you prepare, you give yourself space to speak from the heart. You know how you want the audience to experience you, and you know the points you want to make. You’ve thought it through, so you are able to “simply speak from the heart.” You are less likely to ramble, to say things you don’t intend to say, or to forget the reason you’re speaking.
I’m sure this coach prepares when he’s speaking. And I know he speaks from the heart. Both.
