There are a lot of resources out there that will break down body language piece by piece and tell you what it “means.” I’m wary of this, for several reasons.
The first is that almost nothing can send a message all by itself; these elements work in concert with each other. Body and voice combine with message to send nuanced communication. No one facet stands alone.
The second is that for every time you look at someone with crossed arms and diagnose “they must feel defensive,” you can also look at another person whose arms are crossed and think, “that feels aggressive,” or, more likely, “I don’t have any feelings about that at all.”
Finally, a checklist of physical symptoms are a sketchy shortcut to making an impact. Start with intention. Know why you’re talking. Don’t focus on individual elements of body language to try to get to the result faster; it won’t work.
