Much has been said and written about the power of eye contact—how much, how little, when, where, how to fake it…
Here’s what I suggest:
If you’re speaking to a group, take one thought or sentence or chunk of idea to one area of the audience. Find a person to look at and stay there. At the end of that thought, shift your eye contact to another area of the audience and find a friendly face in that section.
Don’t: Sweep your gaze from one side of the audience to the other, never landing anywhere. We call this the “lawn sprinkler,” and it’s distracting. Yes, you’re passing your eyes over all the people, but you’re not seeing anyone.
Don’t: Keep looking at the same people for long stretches of time. That can make them feel like they’re onstage with you.
Do: Actually look into the eyes of the people you’re talking to, not at the air above their heads or at the foreheads. They can tell you’re not actually looking at them (humans are pretty good at this.)
Do: Practice eye contact, even if you’re practicing alone. Populate the room you’re practicing in; imagine there are people covering the space from your left to your right, and way out in front of you. It can help to put Post-its on the chairs to remind you there will be people there.
